Andile Mpisane: A Prisoner of Luxury
Shauwn “MaMkhize” Mkhize has been on an unrelenting self-care spree with (as we are constantly reminded by the woke brigade) our tax money. From Soccer Clubs, Reality TV, clothing, cars and houses, MaMkhize lives the type of life we download from Pintrest mood boards. As girls blossoming into young women and eventually mothers, we have been playing with dolls modelling what kind of mothers we will be, based on the mothers we emulate or their mistakes that show us what not to do.
The first children we have had are the Barbie dolls and teddy bears we raise in dollhouse mansions programming that motherly instinct reinforced by babysitting, cooking, and the unfortunate rites of passage that enable the overprotective smother that moulds a child into a by-product of our vicarious dreams.
Andile Mpisane is one such example, the butt of many Spoilt rich kid memes from Twitter folk who would give their life to trade places and at least feel the car seat of the BMW M4 or Range Rovers that Sithelo and Tamia have received. I think you’d agree that MaMkhize lost a huge Mzansi Magic Bag by not renewing her reality TV show because the drama is giving and the ratings just off the strength of the trends? Let’s not have this chat chile!
In this uncut, unofficial, insta-live, organic season 2 of KwaMaMkhize I do not see Andile being given much, if any room at all, to be his own man. How do you define authenticity when your entire life is filled with people who are only around you because of the status afforded to you by wealth?
Is Andile even aware that he’s a target for a vast spectrum of come ups? How are we missing the discourse of grooming? Sithelo, who has a knack for dating rich men like her wealthy ex Lord Phil, was 24 years old when she started dating the then 17-year-old Mpisane. In the name of the almighty Rand, she did not see a minor; her moral compass was compromised by a young charmer who fills her Indoda must quota, and as luck would have it, she soul tied her way into his life, giving him 2 kids.
Karma being the remorseless b**** of the millennium, responded to the dare Sithelo threw at the universe when she swore on our victory that her and Andile bazohlukaniswa ukufa and death said, “Ayt bet, Tamia Louww, I call upon you”, resulting in the surprise wedding that has left a bitter taste of lust in all our mouths. Gents wish they had Tamia, dollies want to be Tamia, nothing trumps our Cinderella dreams that marrying into a wealthy family, of course, we pray for our in-laws to be kind but honey, personally I’d rather cry in a Ferarri if you get what I mean.
Death came too early 😭
— YT: 𝓛𝓲𝓯𝓮 𝓸𝓯 𝓪 𝓠𝓾𝓮𝓮𝓻 🦋🌈👑 (@MpumiiZ) December 18, 2021
Sithelo Andile pic.twitter.com/B0n3xdMxS3
I wouldn’t be far off in assuming that under MaMkhize’s care and vicarious smothering, Andile has never bent over backwards in hard work a day in his life. Everything has been a glide from one silver spoon to the next, and he has not appreciated the character development and wisdom that is the diamond in the rough of struggling.
Andile has been drunk on power, love triangles and rushed decisions. He has not taken stock of the permanent life decisions and commitments that he is far too young to make. From being groomed by 27 and 25-year-olds to following the “guidance” of a mother who decides on who joins the Mkhize legacy cast, he is now tasked with maturing at twice the rate of his age mates and has no room to do so because he is surrounded by yes men and folk who presumably make decisions for him. Andile does not have a life; his life is a catalyst for the people around him to pursue their happiness.
The Isizulu Idiom says ubuhle bendoda izinkomo zakhe (loosely translated: the beauty of his man is measured by his wealth) is Andile handsome off his own strength, or is he a pretty come up for us Capitalist Niggers? You tell me. For now, let me go get that Victoria’s secret black number organize some HD nudes and shoot my shot there by IG; there’s money to be made out here ladies!
Xoxo
Luna.